What is infant mental health - and why should parents care?
When we talk about "mental health," we often think of adult challenges: stress, anxiety, burnout. But mental health begins much earlier - from the very start of life. Babies have emotional lives from the very beginning. They might not use words, but they tell us how they’re feeling through their body language, cries, and connection - and how we respond helps shape their sense of safety.
Infant mental health is all about a baby’s social and emotional wellbeing. It's shaped by how they experience the world in their first months and years: how they are soothed, held, spoken to, and seen. These earliest relationships form the foundation for how a child will feel about themselves, manage their emotions, and connect with others throughout life.
Mental health difficulties don’t just emerge in adolescence or adulthood - research suggests that 10-16% of young children experience mental health problems. But support for babies and toddlers is still patchy: a recent survey found that only 9% of parents felt there was sufficient provision for under-twos at risk in their area.
A million new neural connections are formed every second in a baby’s brain during the early years, according to Harvard’s Center on the Developing Child. That means every cuddle, every calm response, every "I'm here" moment matters.
Why Relationships Shape Tiny Brains
Babies don't arrive knowing how to feel safe, loved or calm. They learn that through us. When you pick up your baby and soothe them, their brain begins to associate human touch with safety. When you speak gently or rock them to sleep, you’re doing more than comforting them in the moment - you’re wiring their brain to expect care.
Experts now know that early relationships literally shape a baby’s brain architecture. In fact, the way we respond to distress teaches babies about the world: “Can I trust others? Am I worth soothing?” These early experiences lay the foundation for lifelong mental health and resilience.
It’s why organisations like BrightPIP - a Sussex-based infant mental health charity - talk about how "tiny brains grow in big relationships."
You Don’t Need to Be Perfect - Just Emotionally Present
Many parents worry that they need to get it right all the time. But the truth is, you don’t need to be perfect - just emotionally available and willing to try.
Your baby learns resilience not from never experiencing distress, but from what happens next. When you come back after being momentarily unavailable, when you apologise for snapping, or when you cuddle them after a tough moment, you’re showing them: "You can depend on me. Even when things wobble, I’ll come back."
As Dr Laura Williams, Clinical Psychologist and Director at BrightPIP, puts it: "Your baby learns emotional resilience from your relationship, not your perfection."
Tune In, Don’t Just Tidy Up
A crying baby isn’t a problem to fix - it’s a person trying to communicate. It might be hunger, overtiredness, fear, or simply a need to be close. The most powerful thing you can do is pause, observe, and wonder what your baby might be feeling.
Nurseries are learning this too. At Hopscotch Children’s Nurseries, we’ve developed one of the UK’s first infant mental health policies - written from the perspective of the baby and grounded in the latest clinical insight. It encourages staff to see nappy changes, nap time, and handovers not just as tasks - but as opportunities to build trust and emotional connection.
When babies feel safe, seen and soothed, they thrive.
Why Nurseries Matter, Too
The reason this matters is simple: babies can’t wait. Their brains are developing rapidly, and their emotional templates are being built every day. What they need isn’t more stimulation - it’s more safety. More softness. More consistent care from the people around them, whether that’s parents or practitioners.
Most babies and toddlers in the UK spend time in early years settings. That means nursery staff play a vital role in shaping children’s emotional wellbeing, alongside parents.
Hopscotch’s new policy, developed in collaboration with BrightPIP, is designed to help staff understand and respond to babies' needs in a psychologically informed way. It introduces ideas like co-regulation (soothing babies through warm, consistent responses), emotional safety, and "professional love" - the term used by researchers to describe affectionate, attuned relationships between caregivers and children.
Staff are encouraged to notice early signs of distress, build strong bonds with each baby, and create predictable, calming environments where little ones can feel secure.
The hope is that more nurseries will follow suit, embedding infant mental health into the everyday rhythm of care.
What You Can Do as a Parent
You don’t need training or textbooks to support your baby’s mental health. What matters most is connection. Here are some gentle, everyday ways to nurture your baby’s emotional world:
- Respond with curiosity - Wonder what your baby might be feeling underneath the fuss
- Slow down during care routines - Use nappy changes or feeds as moments of calm connection
- Name feelings - Even if they’re tiny: "That startled you, didn’t it? I’ve got you."
- Repair after tough moments - A soft "I’m here now" goes a long way
- Prioritise your own wellbeing too - Regulated parents help regulate children
You don’t have to do this alone, either. Whether it’s a trusted family member, health visitor, or supportive nursery team, mental health starts in relationships - and that includes yours.
And if your baby attends nursery, ask how staff support emotional wellbeing - not just learning outcomes.
Final Thought
Infant mental health isn’t about diagnosing problems - it’s about giving babies what they need to thrive: comfort, consistency, connection. As Dr Williams says, "Babies need relationships to thrive. When early years settings get this right, the impact is lifelong."
Supporting babies’ mental health doesn’t require perfection - just presence, patience, and people who care.
